i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
she won't be coming home tonight because she tried stealing a baby giraffe from the zoo
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
I am drunk. Riding an elevator. You can smell the beer. Doctor on with me just smiling at me... He agrees, fuck cancer.
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
Randomize
