I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
On your way out, lock the front door. And by lock the front door, I mean find the door handle, reattach it, and then lock it.
Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
They sent me to the hospital. Apparently, of the many things I said, I looked at the doctor and told him, "Wow... it's like you're a REAL DOCTOR!"
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
Just saw a dude dressed as captain america driving down the highway. He saluted me.
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
Randomize
