I can't tonight. I'm still nursing a beach sex injury. Don't wanna talk about it.
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
Laying in bed nude eating a Big Mac with a cat. It's gonna be a good year.
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
He brought me hungover chipotle knowing full well he wasn't getting a blow job. I think he may be too in love with me.
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
Randomize
