I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
You get to be the grown up. Leave a ciabatta by his face.
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
Unless it involves a lot of whiskey, an ACDC concert, and a guy named Juan from the Philippines, then I'm not interested.
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
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