More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
It's more exciting when they aren't single....and even better when you have to pretend that you just slept with their roommate while trying to do the walk a shame as their girlfriend comes marching into the apt.
Im not the least bit jealous of the life you lead.
woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
I just got hit in the face by an old lady love handle.
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
Grindr hookup awareness: always make sure that you agree to blow one person and they aren't bringing a Friend/boyfriend. Shits weird when you're sober.
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
the raccoons are back...
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