oh my god im such an asshole. i just asked the guitarist of bad religion if he was a scalper.
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
he just tried to convince me that tylenol is a gateway drug
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Randomize
