Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
If you're that baked in a class full of people that know you're that baked you tend to offer up a peace offering. Its like the burrito of trust! If eaten you are now obligated to help maintain my grades and keep me from falling out of my chair. $3.75 a morning is worth it for that mafia type protection!
It has become abundantly clear why you give me pixie stix when you're drunk now...
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
Randomize
