my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar.....
.....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls....
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
Randomize
