Wearing these hooker shoes was a mistake
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
you're usually drunk when you offer. there's one time you called me, told me not to dye my hair red, and asked if i wanted to see your tits.
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
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