I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
You cant carve pumpkins without vodka. It's a Halloween tradition.
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
I'm just to the point my give a fucks is so far in the red that I'm going to have to take out a 30yr loan of fucks to repay it
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
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