I just broke up with my girlfriend lets go find strippers that need rent money.
All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
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