That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
I caught myself masturbating while watching a baseball game today. It was over before I realized what was going on. And then I was just confused.
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
She asked what it would take for you to fuck her. You drunkenly mumbled, "pepperoni pizza" and then got in the cab by yourself. You were smiling too. It was weird.
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
Randomize
