Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
Babysitting for someone you accidently sent nudies to is so fucking awkward.
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
Thanks for your faith in my ability to stay sober while writing final essays. It's...unearned.
Handcuffs. Recoverd. I'm a goddamn detective.
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
I have to hand it to her. In my heyday I took home the 'biggest shitshow of the night' award 9 times out of 10. But I passed the torch on to her last night, and she went skipping merrily far and away with it into the enchanted world of aggressive alcoholism. Is this 30?
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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