"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
my secret santa just gave me a pregency test
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
The girl I was Skype sexing just asked for a moment of silence for robin Williams.
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
Help. Why am I so naked?
Randomize
