i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
I don't remember its real name, I just call it the Harrison Ford Cush after that idea with the Indiana Jones mask. I should just get high and sell people my ideas for their Halloween costumes all the time. I'd make a fucking fortune.
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
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