life lesson learned today: sleeping pills and laxatives don't mix.
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
so it turns out the huge bruises on my knees are from drunk bmxing and not getting railed from behind on the ground
and ill have you know that I only wiped out twice
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
what the fuck is wrong with you
Do you want me to go chronologically or alphabetically?
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
Randomize
