would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
I've replaced the bottom of the food pyramid with alcohol.
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
Hey welcome to Rick's drunk text tree. Rick is drunk right now please respond with "shut up" to remove your name from this list. Thanks for playing.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
Apparently unused tampons can also double as things to bite down on during public sex to prevent screaming...
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
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