By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
I just duct taped myself into my costume. I apologize in advance if you find me in a compromised position involving duct tape and underwear when you get home tonight
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
Just lectured your brother about using condoms when hooking up with girls he meets online. I should be a fucking life coach
I'm experimenting with sincerity
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
If you ever get divorced...would you call me??
Randomize
