That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
you were exchanging tortilla chips with the guy at the next table, telling him your table was given the "big chips" because it was your 21st birthday
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
The next time we go out, we're bringing a jar so that people can contribute to the rest of what I need to come up with for my breast implants... We'll show them yours for inspiration and persuasion.
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
You woke up, looked straight at me and screamed "fuck barbara streisand!" and passed out again
dude. I can hear the air.
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
Randomize
