So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
Bro... You handed me an ice cube from your drink and said "tell me if it tastes like pickles".
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
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