Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
Dude, we got to the strip club as they were closing, and you starting crying because, and I quote, "This is the closest to birthday sex I'm gonna get."
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
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