her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
no drinking for a week
if by week you mean tonight and by no you means yes
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
If he ever pulls my hair again, I'm going to conveniently have lock jaw. Then he can decide whether pain during sex is still fucking appealing.
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