Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
I walked a mile in this weather wearing nothing but a toga. Zero fucks. Your move Mother Nature.
Three months into our sexual relationship, he comes out with "Your body is efficient". WTF do I do with THAT?
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
Randomize
