he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
Going on a first date tonight...pros: my boobs look amazing. Cons: my abortion isn't until next week.
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
SOOOOOO I just attempted to go to the gym, hungover. Ended up throwing up in the bathroom. I hope people think I'm just working out really hard
Randomize
