What are you doing tonight?
Watching dora the explorer and pining for a sex life.
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
I have to keep checking she's breathing. This is why we don't drink on Sundays
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
I have never lost more friends than while playing Uno drunk.
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
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