Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
I just got off a plane from Mexico. At least 15 passengers dashed to the bathroom throughout the flight. Can you tell its spring break?
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
Doing laundry. My jeans from last night smell like chicken wings and motor oil.
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
Dear Andy-the problem is not that I slept with your girlfriend, it's that you didn't know she's a lesbian.
you tried to strip tease your way into canada but got arrested instead. don't worry, your mom doesn't know.
Randomize