alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
He's ruined me. Do you know how frustrating it is to know I'll never find another guy as tall and handsome and rich with as big of lips & booty, and cock as him who also rims and takes me on tropical vacations and buys me all the cocaine.
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
Randomize