North Korea, Best Korea!
Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
Question: Is it too early to claim April Fools on the text "can we do some lines before the concert" that I accidentally sent Mom?
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
if anyone breaks out the olive oil & slip n slide, text me 911.
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
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