I just saw how many times I called you last night. You're welcome.
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
So I found where you barfed in my house. Just wanted to let you know that my cat barfed on the kitchen floor in a show of solidarity
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
Randomize
