i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
Whatever you have to do, STALL THEM. Your toothbrush is in the kitchen, my pants are on the balcony, and I don't have eyebrows.
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
Randomize
