Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
Say "Steve Buscemi is hot." with a straight face.
if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
Note to self: do not take so many shots that you sit on the floor under the bar where nobody can see you, and reach out and grab peoples crotch.
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
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