So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
Considering the fact that you wouldn't give me my cat last night because he was "destined for broadway", yeah, I'm accusing you of stealing him
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...
Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
Carson kissed me on my cold sore before I could stop him so I think I gave my kid herpes. Mom of the year. Just call me MOTY.
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
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