I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
i came home at 4 a.m. and made a dozen eggs and three lbs. of bacon. my mom woke up and the only thing she was pissed about was that i used the whole carton of eggs, but then she sat down and ate with me
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
Thanks for letting me pee on your bed and cry about nothing to you. You're a real friend
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
Randomize