Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
i just woke up in the woods behind my house in handcuffs and a dan marino jersey ive never seen before
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
i drank out of a bidet.
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
I'm wearing the jeans from casino night. Tell me why I have a napkin in my pocket that says 'dont fear me'? I'm hoping it was just a coincidence.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
3pm strippers are depressing
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
At least I know that however bad my life gets and how low I can feel I'll never feel shitting in a red robin parking lot low
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
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