Instead of asking if I had a condom she literally said " I'm not on the pill but I'm pro choice... your move"... I'm in love
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
You played Frank Sinatra today after we had sex. You moved way up in my literal book of men. Congrats.
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
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