Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
I was so drunk that I didn't realize he was staying at the Waldorf. I walk of shamed the Astoria, do you even know what this means?
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
someone just laughed at me while i'm laying on the floor waiting for the bus. like they've never been hungover.
I wasn't so much your wingman at that point as I was the interpreter of you point at shit and mumbling to the cab driver.
They sat at the bar while we waited for a table. When the hostess came to seat us, they were shitfaced, and swordfighting wth chop sticks.
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
lol hangovers are for mortals.
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
Bad part of last night: I puked in my hair. Good part of last night: I assembled a posse.
You kept pulling me aside saying "look what I found"
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
Randomize