I just broke up with my girlfriend lets go find strippers that need rent money.
I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
Can you explain to me the broken disco ball in my front yard?
I want him to come over and snuggle with me but put a bag over his head. Is that rude?
It's not rude if you use a pillowcase that's softer.
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
I just saw an easily 300lb shirtless man on a Vespa. My day has been simultaneously made and ruined.
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
Randomize
