im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
only in a texas roadhouse would someone whistle while I was breastfeeding.
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
reason #1 why i should never live alone: i haven't put pants on since she left 26 hours ago. and ive made spaghetti 3 times.
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
Randomize
