Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
guess where i woke up this morning? If you guessed the hospital, you sir are correct.
her facebook's as public as her vagina
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
You BETTER NOT STEAL MY MOTHERFUCKING SQUIRREL
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
My mom just called hysterical. She and her sister found my dead grandma's vibrator.
The apple don't fall far from that tree.
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
Randomize
