He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
come pick me up. please. i just puked in my lap. bring pants.
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday.
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
official rule: if your drunk, it doesn't count
then nothing in my life counts
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
Crust to egg proportion prescribes to a pedantic form of quiche. It's like saying breakfast pizza isn't pizza at all.
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
I need to take my iPad to the Apple store (when this is all over). Do I need to delete all my dick pics/videos or are they used to stumbling across that sort of thing?
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
Randomize
