My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
My brothers dog was hit by a car and died. They're really sad about it.
But they're having a baby! It's like a dog only 40 billion times worse!
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