I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
I just found a casserole dish in my oven filled with broken glass, blood, and chopsticks. And the REALLY fucked up thing is that finding it answered more questions than it raised.
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
I’m going to lick a fucking door knob when this shit is all over
Probably Waffle House
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