I just ate 3 burrito supremes and a crunchwrap...can't feel feet...I think I have diabetes
So we've decided on 'hamburger' as your code for tonight. If you add ketchup or fries, we know the threat level has escalated.
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
Okay the common myth about putting tampons in you nostrils for a nose bleed is busted. It just starts coming out through your throat.
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
Alright I'd bang a 4 sober, It's been like 3-4 weeks or how ever long 4th of July was ago. I wanna fuck something.
4th of July was 12 days ago. The date is literally in the text you just sent.
I don't care about the dates I just wanna bone something.
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
My vagina is very pro this idea
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