the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
I put xanax in the cake batter
Did you really? It all makes sense now.
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
A log hopped out of the fireplace and caught the carpet on fire. Good summary of this election if you ask me.
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
Randomize
