We're facebook friends in real life
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
FYI the landlord called and plumbers will be tearing up the bathroom tomorrow. Apparently the tub is leaking into the apt below us so be sure to pee in the shower today.
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
sorry didn’t mean to call you, i was just trying to put the t-rex emoji beside your name
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
Randomize
