Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
were you wearing a green and blue thong last night?
yes! wait why?
because i found it in my pocket this morning...
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
i don't think the phrases "so shitty" & "taking care of my newborn" should be combined in the same sentence. leave it to her to make it possible eh?
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