Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
Do you know how hard it is to masturbate with a runny nose?
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
I should have considered my snorting capabilities before breaking my nose
Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
Bought pregnancy tests in bulk off amazon. Kinda feel insulted that it asked if I wanted to subscribe for regular shipments.
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
There's a lady rapping at me about making healthy food choices. She lives in a refrigerator. This is not okay with me
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