Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
I'm masturbating to football. This is why I get guys and you don't
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
She is a social worker. An actual good person trying to save the world. I feel like every time I give her an orgasm God wipes a little smudge off of my shit list.
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
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