You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
He asked if it was my vagina. I told him it was my butt. Clearly I need to buy him a map of the female form.
How has he not realized you're pregnant?
Spanx.
You can't date a girl from every country.
I'm the captain planet of women
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
Is it weird that my ex and the dude I'm talking to now both only have one testicle? Apparently I've found my type..
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
Randomize
