I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
Also I feel like 60% of our relationship is based on sausage mcmuffins.
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
One day, tell me please to stop buying shots when I'm overwhelmed. I might have just broken a tooth
No cash. I had to buy four bowls of soup to meet the credit card limit. I'm not even upset. SO MUCH SOUP.
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
Randomize
