Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I sang Sweet Caroline with a homeless man and made him 25 bucks. Redbull vodka gives you wings!
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
God I need to hump something, right now.
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
Randomize
